Sound Principles

Compliments

2010-09-28T07:55:00.000-07:00

Why do we start a question with a compliment?

I attended a talk this afternoon and noticed that a few of the people asking questions in the Q&A session started with a compliment. I do believe they were genuine, and therefore nice, gestures, but am curious as to how does one reacts to such comments.

I'm not good at receiving compliments so am biased towards them. If my speech is good, don't flatter me. Simply ask your question as the real compliment is in the quality of the debate or answer the question brings forth (remember, there are no stupid questions, expect of the unasked one.)

Compliments are good, they deserve their place in a society but they would be better if separated from the question. A speaker needs feedback and the true compliment is in you asking a question : )

Judging

2009-10-03T18:15:00.001-07:00

It's amazing how easy it is to judge someone without realising how little we know about that person or even the context of the situation.

Why?

Why do we spend our time judging others, thinking we know better how they should live their lives? Don't we have enough activities, issues and challenges ourselves that we wander the realms of another?

Bizarre, weird, odd even.

Is it because we were told not to judge that we do so? If so, the brain does work in funny ways. This argument seems to implies that we don't understand the concept of 'don't' and retain the 'judge' part. Utter rubbish if I may judge...

Do we judge because we care? After all, why not share our experiences with someone who could benefit from it? This is altruistic, we are somehow wired to help others and one of the best way we know how is to share what we've been through. I've been through such experiences and am happy someone did take the time to do so. I'm also guilty of doing it to others and not always sure if it had the same effect (though I know at times it completely backfired : )

Sharing is good. Giving an opinion is good. Judging...not so much.

Good intention

2009-09-15T20:24:00.000-07:00

Should we be rewarded for our good intentions?

If the intentions were truly good, they should require no reward : )

We live in reward based world. If I do this, I expect that. No action is done for the pure pleasure or to simply help someone else, without hidden agenda. You could almost argue that charity is a selfish act that is done to satisfy the doer's ego. In most cases, it is. And there is little wrong with it. After all, if we are defined by what we think, by what we do, we might as well be doing good to make us feel good.

Good intentions are the start to doing the right thing. They're not the end however. Good intentions, if based on a dogmatic view of the world, you could as easily lead to do evil as not. So you can't stop at good intentions, you need to have good actions, good rewards, good measurement, etc. In a way, it's just the beginning of being good. That's why so many lose their way, such intention is often hard to keep-up and entropy will drag you down, constantly.

Good intentions are just the beginning. To have them is a gift. All you need now is to implement them everyday, forever.

The knowledge of old hasn't dissapeared

2009-08-30T18:43:00.001-07:00

I've always felt that with the disappearance of civilisations, library, geniuses and their work, dogmatism, etc. a huge amount of knowledge that would be beneficial today had been lost.

That is until recently.

I realised a couple of months ago during a small epiphany that such knowledge was not lost but existed in myth, stories, behaviour, etc. waiting to be rediscovered. The reason it seems to have disappeared is that it is hard work to discover it. Harder than trying to think anew.

Can you question faith?

2009-08-03T02:09:00.000-07:00

Technically you cant...that's the magic of faith

But what's the value of faith if you can't use your free will and question it?

None? All?

Faith is a beautiful thing and we should admire those who possess it. Especially when it's received rather than built. But for faith to be real, we should question it all the time. If it doesn't resist your questioning, then it's not faith. It was simply a belief which can be destroyed by the smallest idea.

True faith resists any question.

Which brings about another question (ironically.) If true faith survives any questions, then what is the value of free will?

None?

Quiet

2009-07-12T21:49:00.000-07:00

How is it that the brain can switch off the noise around it and allow us to focus?

It's puzzling that we can be both creative and focused while in the middle of the noisiest surroundings and let our mind wander away when we're in total silence. The noise around us seem to force the brain to work no matter what. That activity, and the fact that we need to fight it to do a task, enhances our thinking.

Though if the noise is too loud, it could destroy it completely.

Interestingly, it's the change that allows us to focus.

After a period in silence working away we switch off and seek to rest. By moving to a coffee place, we somehow recharge and can take the task at hand one step further.

I don't know how it works and wonder if I need to. It works. That's what matters.

Sloth is not what I thought it was

2009-04-12T07:59:00.000-07:00

I've always thought of sloth as being lazy but it's been redefined for me.

Sloth is not using your talents or gifts...and that's a true sin.

Not using your talents is self-punishment and it punishes us all.

We're all born with one talent, maybe more. But there is one that defines us, defines our role in society and life in general. The issue is that we're not educated to identify or even harness this talent. We're not shown the way. Some are luckier than others and their talent shines so brightly, so strongly, that it comes out, sometimes even against their wills.

This is not the case for everyone.

Most of us need to identify that talent, develop it, nurture it and expand it to its extreme (though not too far ; ) Having a gift is truly not enough. You need to think and work at it all the time. It will never end. And that for most people is scary.

Identifying your talent will take you in areas that you're not comfortable with. It will challenge your thinking and redefine your entire life and the lives of those around you.

Sound like fun?

Maybe, but not always.

The alternative, not fulfilling your talent, is worse. That's the true sin.

Do you see yourself as a brand?

2009-04-07T05:41:00.000-07:00

Let me help you...you are a brand.

If you don't see, that's your problem cause the world sees (and judges you) as a brand.

Your name, famous or not, your lifestyle, your choices, your actions, your vision, your mission, everything you do, say or think cry "this is my brand," 'this is who I am."

Now that we've established that you're a brand. Let's see how you can develop it into something you want (rather than let others define it.)

The first step is fairly easy. You have to decide who you're targeting your brand at. It could be your family, your boss, your friends, a boy, a girl, consumers, etc. You probably won't have just one target or, depending at which stage in your life you are, you might.

Either way, you'll need to define precisely who your target is and then define your message.

The second step, the message, is important as it represents who you are for life, or at least for a long time till you reach your goal. It has to be congruent with your personal beliefs whether material or spiritual. Creating a fake brand will fail cause you won't have the stamina to carry it through. You need to be honest with yourself (not always easy) and define it in relations to the world you're aiming at. If you can summarise your brand into a tagline, even better.

These two steps are the most crucial.

Once done, you'll need to define your strategy, tactics, develop a schedule and measurements (maybe even a budget : )

Let everyone know who you are, what your brand is and work on it everyday.

The journey is worth it.

Staying in touch is hard

2009-03-24T05:25:00.000-07:00

Staying in touch is hard. It's a discipline, an art, a science. We can't assume that friends will stay friends forever. We need to keep at it. We need to talk about nothing, remember a birthday and introduce others. It's true technology has made us more connected than ever before, even turning introverts into social butterflies, but it can only go so far.

Face to face is still the strongest form to connect with others. Nothing's better than to meet someone and discussing things. The subject matters not, as long as we connect, we're alive. For some odd reason, we need to see someone to talk with them (not 'to' them.) Their facial expression, their eye, their smile make all the difference. Not that we need to be with friends all the time, being alone has its value, but give me a good conversation with people who like each other anytime : )

Brain, brainy, brainless

2009-02-26T23:27:00.000-08:00

The brain is a terrible thing to waste...though once you waste it, you won't know the difference.

We spend our entire childhood learning even though we don't really know what our learning style is. We then learn some more to practice a trade, profession or simply run around naked for a few years (a learning of its own.)

Then we face two choices: Stop learning or learn forever.

Frankly, the most interesting of the two is the latter. No doubt.

What scares me most are people who stop learning as they become dogmatic, sure of themselves (often beyond reason) and simply stubborn. Let's face it, it's much more fun to be stubborn while you keep on learning.

The good news is that if you've chosen point one, you won't be reading this.

For those who keep on learning I say keep on challenging yourself. Never stop. Read, talk, write, question, ask, challenge, agree, disagree, push the envelope, fight, give-in, try, do, etc.

It never ends. And the more we know, the more you'll realise how little we actually know. The more we push our brains, the more they expend.

What other mission should one have in life?

Well, to put such wisdom and mental capabilities to the benefit of others but that's another post : )

Never go to be the same person you were in the morning.

Opportunities

2009-02-23T01:39:00.000-08:00

The world is full of opportunities, of possibilities, whether in good times or bad ones.

But which one is right for you?

We tend to dismiss what looks too good to be true, even for the right reasons. We further justify why something won't work simply because that's the way our family, friends or teachers think. We evaluate what's coming our way and decide it will take too much time, too much money, too many people. We think of what we'll give-up to reach this goal and decide it's not worth it.

In a nutshell, we are the problem.

What about when we try too many things? We forget to focus simply because we don't want to miss a good opportunity. So we enter in all sorts of partnerships, ventures or develop new ideas even before we've seen one to fruition.

Again, we are the main problem.

The world is full of opportunities. It's almost endless. To recognise the right one is a gift we must hone.

Then all we need is to put it to the acid test: Passion and commitment.

- Can you do something with passion so that waking-up in the morning won't be a issue?

- Can you commit to it day-in, day-out till it succeeds?

Answer these and you'll be on your way.

Stress, stressful and stressed

2009-02-17T01:37:00.001-08:00

Stress is external they say, a situation is only stressful if you let it affect you, blah, blah, blah

Stress is stressful. We need it. We strive under it. Too little of it kills us. Too much of it kills us.

Stress is not the issue. It's a life fixture. Our reaction is the issue.

No doubt you are currently experiencing stress and the current conditions are but a part of it. A simple fight with your spouse will make any market crash look like a walk in the park. A friend dropping you will be more felt than a country going bankrupt (unless you also live in that country and then you're screwed.)

What shall you do?

Well, you can ignore stress and build-up tensions that will eventually show-up as disease or psychological troubles. You can deflect it towards someone else and act like a jerk. In this case, it's your relationships that will be in trouble. You can blame someone else thinking that it can't be your fault (it might not be entirely yours but we do have some responsibilities every time we vote, talk or act.)

The best way is to embrace it. To build it as part of your life. To expect it at all time. To break it down, even share it, when it's too big. To avoid making a mountain out of it when it's too small.

Have you noticed that when we don't have stress coming our way we create some?

Doing nothing

2009-02-08T16:02:00.001-08:00

Doing nothing can be a curse, a way to avoid responsibility and let evil have its way. When there is a choice between right and wrong, doing the right thing is the only course of action that makes sense.

But this is not what this is about.

Doing nothing is often the only way to develop yourself.

The ability to do nothing is hard for most people. We prefer to be active, to think things through and get things done. We have to have a plan, a strategy, tactics and a timeline. We need to close, conclude, achieve, finish and move on. We can simply rest and do nothing. There is so much to do.

And there will be so much to do tomorrow too.

When the grand questions of life pop-up in your mind (they will) you can search the world without and your world within to find the answer. If you're lucky, you'll find it. If you're not, you might still find it. Or not. All paths are the right ones.

It has been said 'seek, and you shall find' and to us the word 'seek' takes on an active role. We need to do something to find what we want, what we need. It's true in a way. The first step though is to know what you want (oh, wait. That's the hardest step though.)

Doing nothing is not natural (procrastinators beware...and apologies in advance :) The ability to do nothing and be still takes time. You'll know it by the expression "stop and smell the roses" and to some this means activity. But at the right time, this is doing nothing at its best.

The Wisdom Chain

2009-02-06T00:04:00.001-08:00

Can you become wise? Or are you born with it?

There is a wisdom chain that we can follow to become wiser:

Data -> Information -> Knowledge -> Wisdom

So the more we learn, the more we read, listen to others, experience, see, understand, the wiser we become. Still, it could leave us short of being wise. If this was the only road, we'd all be better off but still short of our true potential.

Wisdom is innate. It's comes from what we have within and the beauty is, we all have it. There is no segregation in wisdom. Only people who stop along the way.

The most beautiful thing about wisdom is, just like knowledge, when it is shared, both parties are wiser. The giver doesn't loose anything and the recipient blossoms.

Now, why do we keep it all for ourselves if we know the way?

Books. Myself. No! books

2009-02-02T05:30:00.000-08:00

I use to think that books had all the answers...so I read everything I could find (and still didn't make a dent in the flurry of books we now have.)

Then I learned that all the answers I was looking for were inside of me.

And now I heard that books have all the answers.

I'm a tad confused.

The reality is both are true. We do possess the ability to find most of the answers we need within. And books also have most of the answers cause, chances are, somebody, somewhere, has experienced what we're going through, learned from it, and wrote about it.

The problem is that neither are easy.

You might have to read a hundred book before you find the right answer. You might a hundred hours thinking or meditating on a problem and get nowhere.

So we need both.

Meditate?

2009-01-30T02:12:00.000-08:00

Easier said than done.

The mind plays trick on us and constantly busy itself with serious or useless stories. It likes to chat. To solve problems. To create others. Anything as long as it not silence.

The subconscious likes silence. Order. Creativity. To be asked and to answer. To define our world and change it at will. It connects with others. Listens and reacts. Speaks and wait. It's all encompassing and yet alone in all.

Quieting the mind is a worthy goal. Opening ourselves to our deeper self even worthier. Trying to change the soul, however, is a useless waste of time. It's already perfect. We just need to remove the ego to let it shine. All it asks is to be left alone to run it's own course. Thinking against it wastes our lives. Thinking to support it makes us great.

Meditate. Quiet your mind. Let your subconscious show you the way, let it teach you what your soul knew all along. You are great, you are worthy. You know what you're doing.

Where are our manners?

2009-01-19T02:05:00.000-08:00

Having manners can be as simple as saying "please" and "thank you." Our mothers said so.

It's still true.

That simple fact can change our lives. There is so much we should be thankful for and saying so when you move around life, makes others feel appreciated.

It does go beyond that however. Acknowledging, thinking, watching, helping...so many ways we could improve our social lives by simply paying more attention to the world around us. The mistakes are endless and we all make them: not holding the door, ignoring someone's cry for help, not answering an email, not returning a call, watching someone fall, get lost, etc.

Manners is the oil that makes life with others so much easier. At its core: RESPECT

Without respect, there is nothing worth living for, nothing worth fighting for. On that note, a fight goes better if you respect the other party (easier said than done of course but worth remembering.)

Respecting the right to be different, to believe something else, to have different values, to view the world in other ways will make your life richer, more meaningful, more interesting. There is no doubt about it.

Whether in business or in life, try it.

Purpose

2009-01-13T17:33:00.000-08:00

Life's no fun without a purpose.

We're not told that in school. We're not taught to define our lives. Some parents do so but are not sure about the way to take. Others, know exactly which road to take and teach their children.

The few who decide early in life what they want to be, are often encouraged and find that the road, though difficult, opens itself to them. For the rest of us, it's pretty much a series of intersections without signs.

One important aspect about purpose is that it needs to include others. A purpose is only grand when it changes the world, even in small way. Another is that it needs to be defined, tagged even, and then worked on every single day without faulting.

A purpose is no joke. Faced with the challenge, many wither and die. Preferring to remain anonymous, to be normal (nothing wrong with that.)

Yet we're all born with an opinion and that opinion is a reflection of our life's purpose. We need to understand it, define it and brand for the world. Cause the truth is simple, your opinion counts.

What an I idiot I can be...

2009-01-09T17:16:00.000-08:00

There is no other explanations for it...at time, we simply act like idiots.

It can be with a loved one, a friend or a colleague, we act in a way that if someone did that to us, we'd simply say: 'what an idiot.'

What pushes us to behave a such a manner? So many psychological reasons but one of the main one is pride. Pride can be such a killer. It makes us do things (with our consent) that in a normal state of mind we'd probably wouldn't.

How do we get rid of pride?

Well, funnily enough, one way is to recognise that we can be such idiots at time and that we don't always have our wits at hand. We loose it, we regress, we don't think, whatever the reason, we sometimes act in a such a way that is humbling...if we recognise what we just did.

We all have a book in us

2009-01-05T16:59:00.001-08:00

It could be about our family, about ourselves or even a novel, business book, adventure, etc.

All we need is an idea, and we get tons of those, and the will to carry it through.

This is where most of us fail...we need to act on it. The idea is not enough. The difference between a thought about what could be and what is, is ACTION.

It can take years to write a book but if it's good, it will be immortal.

This is crucial to who we are. We need your book, whatever it is cause you'll never know what it can do to the world till you write it. It might be turned down, ignored or even destroyed but it should be written.

If not for us, for you.

Logic

2009-01-04T20:48:00.000-08:00

Logic is a powerful tool, it can cover all manners of sin.

We need logic to make sense of the world we live in. It helps us decide right from wrong (as those two change often.) It shows us the way forward by letting us evaluate options. It helps us write a story or successfully defend an opinion. It's a great decision tool and is used in pretty much every endeavour you can think of.

Let's say it, logic is a gift of the gods. Without it, we'll go mad.

The problem is that we all have our own form of logic. To us, the way we think is the right logic. It's a mixture of who we are at birth and the environment we live in (especially the kindergarten we come from.) As we grow older, we adapt our logical thinking to suit our needs as well as to reflect the current way of thinking or the last new idea we received (ideas are powerful logic breakers and makers.)

Being aware of what form of logic we own, how to adapt it, how not to be blinded by it, is a powerful skill. Being such a powerful force in our lives, it's bizarre that we don't keep on learning about it as we mature....

Focus

2008-12-30T19:07:00.001-08:00

It's true, what we focus on, happens. Whether good or bad (Though inherently, nothing is either good nor bad. Only our interpretation of it makes it so.)

Focus is one of the strongest force in the universe.

We have to admire the child who decides to be a doctor, scientist or policeman and works at it for the rest of his life. The rest of us, however, do spend a lifetime trying to understand the meaning of life, what we're here for, what's our purpose, etc...We could miss life altogether by doing so.

We need to make a call. Choose what we want to focus on. The opportunities are endless. Our problem is often that we don't know what we want. Nor do we want to miss a good opportunity by being too focused. The world is a big and interesting place and there is so much to do, why should I waste it by narrowing my choices? It's this kind of thinking that allows us to waste our lives. It's true, you can do anything you put your mind to. Yet that's too general, you need to decide what you want, what you need, or what you're good at.

Then focus your efforts on it.

Crossing the line

2008-12-29T19:28:00.000-08:00

When does one cross the line?

'You've crossed the line' we're told...where is that line?

The ever existentialist Joey from Friends said it well: 'Over the line? You... you.. you're so far past the line that you can't even see the line! The line is a dot to you!'

More often than not, we know we've crossed the line when someone else tells us. So, isn't such state entirely dependent on the other person's viewpoint?

Which brings us to judging and opinion.

Every time I 'cross the line', it is a judgement you make based on your opinion. And while it is important, it is still your opinion. Nothing more, nothing less. As such, I will keep the right to react to it the way I want. Cause every time you judge me based on your opinion, I can only get hurt if I let it do so. My role is to make sure that I don't let you affect my life because you've made a call based on your experience and interpretation.

Of this, I have to be aware all the time because I could do the same to you.

Know thyself...then what?

2008-12-28T18:41:00.001-08:00

Knowing yourself is probably the most important adventure you'll ever take...and it's endless...

Written in stone and in poetry, those words are their own philosophy. And one that is not easy to follow. Why is that?

It's hard to know who we are. We know what we don't like better than what we like. We know we think, and therefore are, but we don't know if we think right or well. And when do know so, we turn arrogant and inflexible bringing us back to where we started. And the more we know about the world outside, the more we realise that it's the world inside that matters. Yet how we react to that outer world, is an important element of knowing oneself. At one point, most of us decide to explore this world of our own. We study dreams, meditate, join orders, experience in drugs, choose a religion, fight for it, become atheists or agnostics and ponder what it all mean. All in all, we search for ourselves everywhere, even inside, and are often left with more questions than answers.

Suppose you finally know yourself, then what?

What do you do with that knowledge? Do you share it risking to be seen as arrogant and potentially pedantic? do you keep it secret and let the rest of us find out our own path? Do you create parables and story and let the worthy be initiated into your realm?

Well, if you've found the way, share it and let us deal with our emotions.

Sometimes it feels it's easier not to know oneself. Yet, the only way to grow starts there. No exceptions.

Friends

2008-12-27T00:32:00.001-08:00

Life would be empty without friends, yet they can make it more difficult...

Try living without any and you'll find life meaningless in no time.

Friends can come in heartbeat and take years to leave you. They can also take years to become one and disappear in a heartbeat. That's why they should be sought, treasured and helped when they need you.

This is the secret of friendship. It's one of the hardest thing you'll do in life. For to be filled with friends, you have to be one.

And that mean letting go of yourself, letting your petty needs behind for their sake. It's easier said than done for we see life from our point of view at all times. Everything evolves around us and we often create the life we want (or deserve ; ) It's not about annihilating yourself for others though. Ascetics don't really have friends (could be wrong there.) You have to be yourself and be able to change and adapt to the world around you. If you're a jerk (and you might not see it so this is irrelevant), your friends will reflect you (if you have any left.) If you're too nice, they might abuse you. If you're too interesting, the might feel threatened (in this case, change you friends for better ones ; )

Whatever the case, to be a friend is a lifestyle, a choice, a mission.

Dreams

2008-12-23T17:48:00.000-08:00

Without a dreams, we're nothing. Without dreaming, we'll lose it.

Either way, we need to dream. And we need a dream to feel complete.

Whetter you call it a dream, a vision, a mission, etc., doesn't matter. What is is crucial is to define your dream so that you know your role in the world. All of us have the potential to change this world and make it better. The dream can be big, can be small, but it has to be.

Then you can act on it (though faking it till you make it could work here as well.)

Your dream is based on your values, on what you're good at, what you don't like, what you want to change, what you see in others, what you see in yourself. Interestingly, your dream can be good or bad. As a result, your impact on the world can be good or evil. Your choice.

Preferably, for our own sake, let your dream be good. Define it, talk about it and let the people who can help you, help you.

'Be patient' they say.

2008-12-21T18:47:00.000-08:00

'Be patient' they say. Jean de La Fontaine said it well: 'Patience and time do more than strength or passion.'

I've never found out who was the 'they' who seems to know more about our lives than we do but am sure that most progress has been achieved by people who couldn't wait.

Patience is good. Impatience is good.

We can't be satisfied with the status quo. We need to progress. It could be a curse but that's what we do. So we must change what we don't like. Though, it's more often in ourselves that we need to change. For changing others, or being impatient with their faults (which are often similar to ours) is a pure waste of time. We are not their path nor are they ours. Sometimes these paths cross but more often than not, they barely touch each other.

Life is a mixture of patience and impatience. We're impatient to reach maturity and, once there, we're more patient with death (let it take its time.) We're impatient with loved ones and patient with strangers (still haven't figured that one out.) We're impatient with things we can't control and patient (sometimes even procrastinating) with those we can.

The balance between the two, as always, is where most of life resides.

Upsetting Someone else

2008-12-20T00:29:00.001-08:00

Why do we upset other people?

When we get upset, we know exactly what turned us from a happy camper into a maniac. We ruminate the wrong that was done to us, prepare for revenge, verbal or otherwise, and sometimes even act on it. All this while, the 'enemy' caries on living without a care in the world.

What's wrong with him?

Well, he might not have even noticed that you got upset out of something he did, said or wrote. He probably was genuinely interested or concerned and expressed himself with the context of his limited understanding of life and the issue at hand (we all live in such a delusion, it's called reality.)

Here lies the irony: We often behave in the same way.

We go about life thinking that are thoughts are the best and often do not hesitate in sharing what our 'right' view of the world is. sometimes the words do not reach their audiences, after all, they're also caught-up in their own lives.

From time to time, however, those words, those actions hit right in the heart and soul of the recipient. Hurting so deeply at an already wounded ego that the person will not believe what you've just said.

What we do, say or think might upset others. This doesn't mean we should stop living and giving our opinion. After all, we'll never know how people react....

Paying Attention

2008-12-18T21:25:00.001-08:00

Why should you pay to be attentive? Cause if you're not, it'll cost you.

We are very distracted, easily distracted, often distracted, whatever the adjective, we're not always in control of what controls our attention. Yet the ability to pay for attention is a gift we need to hone. Its rewards are limitless but the best among them is the benefit of being in the present.

Our past is gone and our future is yet to be.

We are a product of the present, that's all we have in today crazy and relentless world. Who cares if we know everything that the media have to offer?who cares if we've read all the books that others have published? To be 'in the know' is a often a curse. To be ignorant, just about the same.

Seek the balance between being aware and unaware. Pay attention to who you are.

Read, read, read some more

2008-12-17T23:24:00.000-08:00

Books don't have all the answers (I think, cause I haven't read them all) but they sure have many of them.

Reading is one of mankind greatest gift. The ability to learn and experience what others have felt and thought through words is priceless. It allows to expand our mind and ensure that it will never fall back to a lesser state.

The trick is, of course, to keep on reading. Whether you're focused on what you like or are reading whatever comes your way, you'll know a world often reserved to the few.

A side benefit is the array of ideas you'll gain and, the vocabulary. It seems that there is a direct correlation between the amount of words you know and your ability to succeed (read that somewhere.)

One thing's for sure, the more you read, the richer your life becomes.

Unaware

2008-12-14T18:08:00.000-08:00

We spend a lifetime unaware of the consequences of what we do, think and believe have on others. Worse yet, we often don't care.

Like the famous butterfly who's wing movement create a storm on the other side of the world (cliche or not, it's a powerful story), we talk, judge, decide, act and freely share our opinion without thinking of their consequences (I wonder if I'm not doing that as I write this...)

Thoughts are things, so what we think, even without saying it, has consequences.

The simple fact of being leads to consequences.

The question is what type of consequence would we like to create in our own lives? Most of us focus on the positive of course. Who wants to make the world worse than it was when we were born? Don't answer that. Am sure some do. But most of us prefer to leave it a better place.

And it can only start by controlling our thoughts, or training our thinking so that it results in such a world...and the hardest job in the world is to think, the second, to think for good.

Take Action

2008-12-12T18:42:00.000-08:00

Over and over I get asked what to do when the whole world is falling apart.

Well, you can focus on the doom & gloom and create your own self-fulfilling prophecy which will result in more doom & gloom. You can look at the world with rosy sunglasses and pretend there is nothing wrong or you can choose the middle road.

The middle road is to simply accept what's going on, defining or re-defining yourself (think skills, abilities and capabilities) and get out there and do something about it.

Take action.

As Goethe said: 'Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it.'

The world of tomorrow will be defined by those who do something about it.

I know it's easier said than done. After well, there are so many people at fault for our current turmoil. Yet, whatever you decide to think and do will be your choice.

You choice, your call. Do something.

Change

2008-12-10T17:38:00.001-08:00

The only certainty in life is change...this is such an old cliche that it's worth repeating again and again and again.

Change happens

That's the fact. You can accept it, deny it, push it, ignore it....whatever works for you but the fact remains. Embracing change is refreshing. It keeps you on your toes. It keeps you in the game. It keeps you up to date and ready to face whatever comes your way. It even makes you more optimistic cause you'll see everything has an opportunity to grow, to learn and do something new and challenging.

Learn to embrace change. It's probably one of the best advice ever given. Can't remember who told me that but I'm thankful. And the funny thing with change is that once you're into it, you start becoming a driving force for it.

Go forth and change yourself.

Imagine your future

2008-12-09T18:13:00.001-08:00

We often forget that imagination is one of the strongest force in the universe

Einstein said it well: Imagination is more important than knowledge

We also associate imagination with the Arts, or some form of creative endeavour. Yet, it's a tool that can be used in every areas of our lives. Imagination can be about small things as well as big. Interestingly, big things that were imagined often started as small ones.

Imagining helps us cope with an often bleak reality. We can create the world we want to live in, stories that ends the way we want, actions that gets the right results...without getting too delusional of course. It also stretches our minds, allowing us to become better, more fulfilled, more interesting to others. And once the mind is stretched, it'll never come back to its original state (Oliver Wendell Holmes said that.)

Another secret of imagination is that it can create the world we'll live in tomorrow.

Take Science Fiction for example, you can't get more creative than that. Well, the world those writers create is defining our world of tomorrow. What they made-up, someone, somewhere is working on it and might even give it the shape and form of the same object seen on cinema screen...Imagine that : )

Fun, fun, fun

2008-12-08T23:11:00.001-08:00

No one should be denied the power of having fun...whether in life or work.

We learn best when we're having fun. Enjoying oneself is the secret to a successful and happy life. We could go on and on but you get the message.

The issue is therefore to identify what you enjoy most cause, chances are, that's your gift.

And you need to own and hone your gift to change the world. Don't be fooled, your life is about changing the world. In a big or small manner, you're here to change the world and show us how great life can be. With a bit of luck, a lot of hardwork an a huge amount of fun, I'll do the same for you. For when we meet, we should enjoy each other company and both be the better for it,

Know yourself, know what makes you tick, know what you're better at than everyone else and have fun with it.

Expectations

2008-12-05T16:05:00.000-08:00

What do you expect out of life? Out of others?

Of the first one, everything. Of the second, nothing.

We should expect everything out of life. Though we're not specific enough, as like a genie, life gives you exactly what you ask of it. No more, no less. And often, its interpreation of your words can be different from what you were expecting.

We should expect nothing out of others. It's not fair to them. It's not fair to us. Often, such expecations makes us angrier and we're the one carying the burden, not them.

Expect much, expect nothing. Figure out where to apply these concepts and you'll have learn an ancient secret.

Self-pity

2008-12-04T17:43:00.000-08:00

Self-pity can be fun...for a minute...

To think that the whole world is responsible for our misery, what a powerful thought. What a thrill it is to be at the centre of a world that exists only in our head.

When that minute is gone, it's time to move-on. Nothing worthwhile has ever been achieved by indulging in self-pity (I love to state the obvious ; )

It's not easy to get out of it though. It's like the chant of a siren, attracting you into the depth of an ocean of your own stupidity.

Resisting the call takes all that you have left. It will hurt, it will be humbling, it might even redefine who you are entirely. At the end of the journey, however, you will be stronger, more aware, more in control and eventually happier. That, I promise.

Fight your way out of self-pity, or let go of it, whatever works for you but do something about it.

Help yourself

2008-12-03T17:42:00.001-08:00

There is nothing more difficult than helping yourself.

It's actually easier to help others as we often believe that we know what's best for them. Some even believe that helping others is the true meaning of life (I'm one.) In a way, we do know what's best for others as we can see their lives, their struggles, their opportunities with the detachment of a third party. We don't have the power to see ourselves in such a light so we don't always know what's best for ourselves.

So if you don't know what's best yourself and read a self-help book, you're basically helping an idiot (again, I once was and probably still am.)

Over the years we develop a clear view about what we don't want, some areas we're sure we want and an overall direction for our lives.

We have to admire those among us who have a clear view of their life's mission and work tirelessly towards it. For the rest of us, we need to live, experience, make mistake and often stumble unto the right mission. Either way, life is a mission.

We better get to it.

Enjoy the moment

2008-12-02T18:20:00.000-08:00

The moment is all we have.

There's never been a better time than now. Despite world changes, despite the pain, despite the forced evolution, this is a great time to be alive and kicking (and that Chinese proverb is not even a real one anyway ; )

Changes are common in every life that I've met. Some cope with it well, others shy and hide from it. Either way, it's coming us everyday like a brick all. Your ability to break through is entirely up to you. And just like in martial art, such ability can be learned. We are, after all, a product of our environment.

The cool thing is that once you've realised that, you can do something about it. And the only time to do so is now. There is no yesterday, no tomorrow, just now. You can learn from your past and predict your future but there is just now.

Maybe now is a good time to go back to that philosophy book you always wanted to read, take that psychology course or dance lesson.

Decide. Do.

Patience, is it a virtue? I can't wait to find out.

2008-12-01T02:22:00.000-08:00

Patience is a virtue they say.

Who's they?

The hidden wise men who can never face the wisdom they expose us to.

Patience is often useful but its opposite is as powerful.

After all, if we all waited to become better, nothing would change. We need to act to change the world (nothing new there.) And acting requires a certain form of impatience. The form that challenges the status quo, that challenges ideologies, that challenges current wisdom, and in many cases, that challenges reality. The fools who've redesigned our world and History have never been known to be patient individuals...

To be patient requires the will to wait, to often be idle in the face of reality. It often works. God does work in mysterious ways and often forces us to develop such patience (often to our benefit.)

To be impatient requires control and a force of life that can only be described as courage.

Use both.

Goals...how are you doing?

2008-11-24T05:28:00.001-08:00

The end of the year marks two major events: how are you doing with your current goals and what goals will you set for next year...

Goals are important. The bigger the better they say. The fact is, no goal is too small if it impacts your life and that of others. Even bigger goals should be broken down into smaller, manageable, ones.

Setting goals is the easy part. Use the SMART technique to help you. As for which areas of your life do you need to set your goals in, check Michael Heppell's Wheel of Life or the Gary Blair's Goal Setting Model.

The challenge, and it is a challenge, lies in doing something every day towards reaching them. There is no other way. You can use the help of a coach, a friend, a software, incentive and rewards, whatever works for you. It's the daily task that makes a difference. Without it, you'll see the end of next year without having moved an inch.

Set big goals, break them down, work at them everyday and enjoy the process.

Why do we fear being ourselves?

2008-11-19T17:12:00.000-08:00

It makes no sense.

We're are at our best when we are ourselves.

Why would we fear something so natural?

Yet, the fears of acceptance, rejection, ridicule, shame, exclusion drive how we behave. Such fears often force us to settle-down, take the easiest route, not start a business...you name yours.

Fear is a funny vibration but it's a vibration nonetheless...thinking it, feeling it leads to more of it.

It is easier to stay hidden, not to show the world what we're capable of. Yet, we all need you to show what you're capable of. We need your ideas, your opinion, your action, your desire to strive and succeed against all odds. Without it, we're all a little less successful, a little interesting, or worse, a little less interested.

Which path to take?

2008-11-16T20:38:00.000-08:00

As the world evolves into another one of its transitions, we have to wonder if the path we took is the right one. In fact we should ask ourselves that very question at every turn we took.

Some of us will end-up winning, others loosing, and many more lost in the status quo. Either way, our choices will have lead us to where we are now.

Which path to take?

It's the eternal question. And for some weird, esoteric reason, whichever path you take will be the right one. We make such decision based on what we know, what others say (not too often I hope) and what we believe the future will be. So how can one make the wrong choice with such, yet limited, knoweldge?

You can't.

The wrong path is still the right path for you. The issue is not the bad decision you made, the issue is what you'll do with that decision.

Robert Frost said it better:

The Road Not Taken

TWO roads diverged in a yellow wood,

And sorry I could not travel both

And be one traveler, long I stood

And looked down one as far as I could

To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,

And having perhaps the better claim,

Because it was grassy and wanted wear;

Though as for that the passing there

Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay

In leaves no step had trodden black.

Oh, I kept the first for another day!

Yet knowing how way leads on to way,

I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh

Somewhere ages and ages hence:

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—

I took the one less traveled by,

And that has made all the difference.

It's easier to give-up

2008-11-13T05:46:00.000-08:00

It's so much easier to give-up than to fight on. It's the nature of things, it's our nature.

There is nothing wrong with deciding to stop a project that is not bringing fruits. The only catch it when to stop. Too early, and you're giving-up. Too late, and your bankrupt. It'd be foolish to keep on doing the same thing and expecting different results (heard that before) but when you're in the midst of things, it's difficult to see the signs. Interestingly, missing those signs are what turns hopeless projects into great fortunes.

Frankly, it's more fun to never give-up.

A book is gone...

2008-11-11T17:49:00.000-08:00

Every time someone passes away, a book is gone.

We are a collection of feelings, appetites, desires, experiences, thoughts and ideas that no one else, no matter how great or small, can reproduce. You almost owe it to the world to share yourself with others. It's the only way we'll know you, it's the only way we'll learn.

As we remember those who passed away before us, let's imagine the knowledge they could have shared had they penned down their thoughts. And to those who did, let's read their story and expand our minds.

Do the world a favour, share your thoughts, ideas and philosophy. Write it down and pass it own to your family at least. I know I'd love to have such memories of my parents.

We'll never make it alone...

2008-11-09T18:02:00.001-08:00

The world is a social place. We play, live and die with others. It could be said that the meaning of life is simply others. What we do with them, for them and through them defines who we are often in a better way than any mission we define for ourselves.

Leaders are no exception. Leaders of all kind are only as effective as the people they lead. The latter, often save the formers from themselves. If only leaders would listen : )

Check Tapping the Power of Participatory Leadership workshop in Bali, you have everything to gain.

Can one man change the world?

2008-11-05T17:33:00.000-08:00

Yes, it's been proven over and over again that one man can change the world, though not alone we must add. But what are the remaining 6 billions doing?

They're doing the same, though in a different scale.

You see, changing the world doesn't mean changing the world as a whole. It means changing the world you see, the little bit you can control. That positive change (it does have to be a positive change) can influence the world in a way that you can't even fathom.

So think, write, speak, do, or whatever you're good at. This alone will change your world. If you don't use your talents, you're shortchanging yourself and the rest of us...

You've got to know Jim Rohn

2008-11-04T16:47:00.000-08:00

Well over 20 years ago, Jim Rohn revealed some of the most potent success principles known to man in a 2 day leadership weekend seminar. This presentation was recorded on video tapes and was meant to be used as a reference for the attendees of the workshop; just in case they needed a refresher course. But in the late 1980's they disappeared They have now been recovered and contain some of the most powerful success principles ever shared. In those tapes, Jim Rohn shared the secrets that helped him achieve millionaire status by the age of 30. What Jim Rohn revealed on the videos also became the foundation of the many principles shared by world-class personal development gurus today, and his thoughts and ideas continue to be quoted (word-for-word) even after all these years! To view some sample clips from this amazing event and also learn more about this lost footage go to: http://classic.jimrohn.com

Humour at all time will save us all

2008-11-03T00:33:00.000-08:00

“I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, "Where's the self-help section?" She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose” George Carlin

It's difficult to take yourself too seriously if you have a good sense of humour (even a mild one.)

I get a kick out of stating the obvious...but what is a sense of humour?

We all find different things hilarious and often, clash in our interpretation of the same joke. What is funny to you is not necessarily funny to me...yet, it's probably still funny. The reality is that it doesn't matter. You need to find out what makes you laugh and consume more of it.

Check these out:

Are you afraid of what's new?

2008-10-29T20:00:00.000-07:00

Are you afraid of what's new?

Not everyone likes change. To some, it's even terrifying. Yet, to paraphrase the cliche, change is now the only constant we can rely on.

Enjoy change, embrace it. It offers gift that no one can foresee. It offers the opportunity to redefine yourself when you thought all was lost.

The funny thing is, you don't have to make dramatic changes. Make simple changes, even small ones. The end result with amaze you.

And if you haven't read this, do so now. I'm sure you'll be better for it.

Tomorrow will never be the same - The time, they are changin'

2008-10-29T01:26:00.000-07:00

If your time to you

Is worth savin'

Then you better start swimmin'

Or you'll sink like a stone

For the times they are a-changin'.

Bob Dylan, 1963

I'm always suspicious when someone takes a passage of a great text or lyrics and use it in a different context. Suspicious because it often works way too well. In this case, Bob Dylan's song does teach us something we already knew. Today is different from yesterday and chances are, it won't be the same as tomorrow. The issue is not the changing time, these will always happen, the issue is what we will do to survive it...wither and die? fight? The latter sounds more fun.

Tomorrow will never be the same. And in a way, I'm grateful for that. Being stale kills the soul.

So we live in interesting time...What will you do to survive it?

How to get out of poverty?

2008-10-27T22:10:00.001-07:00

Hi

How do you get out of poverty? Poverty of mind, of finance, you name it.

Oversimplified, it looks like this:

1) Read/Learn
2) Act

There is nothing you can't learn and therefore nothing you can't do if you read well.

The trick is to read well.

Check the teaching company at www.teach12.com, you'll be impressed.

Frederic

Is the answer you're looking for in a book?

2008-10-27T22:09:00.001-07:00

I've completed cleaning my library and found out that I had more than 400 books on self-help.

Besides the fact that I've contributed to someone else's wealth, I'm wondering if I've really changed, if I've really learned anything...

The simple fact is, I have. I do believe my life is better because of these books. I'm more successful, more interested (hopefully more interesting too,) and definetly a sucker for life and beyond.

Going through them, I realised that I've read classics as well as unknown authors. Of the two, the classics have played a more important role partly because they were social phenomenon (I could relate to a lot of statements people made.)

The unkown authors have had their place too and I often realised that the knowledge famous authors used, and made money from, we taken in part from these earlier unknowns.

One last note, the self-help movement is prone to abuse and you're better off reading this book when you begin your journey to a better you:

Don’t be fooled, developing yourself is hard.

2008-10-27T22:08:00.001-07:00

Don’t be fooled, developing yourself is hard.

It’s not something you can do one day and drop the next. It’s a lifetime commitment to become better, to succeed, to show yourself that you can go the extra mile. Not everyone has what it takes.

The good news is that you can learn it, step by step, continuously. But where do you start?

The best way to is to read the following books to get a feel of what you're getting yourself into:

These are just the beginning for reading is easy. The challenge is in the doing and that's all the difference.

Good luck.

Frederic